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I have never felt such a welcoming kindredness as I have since becoming a mom.

For the most part, moms are super supportive and just want to encourage one another. We’ve been through the hard times, so we’re able to relate when we see another parent having a rough day.

There are definitely the negative ones out there that want to “mom-shame” for any number of reasons, but I haven’t had that experience, fortunately.

The moms I know have just been so gracious and understanding. I’ve received great advice when I’ve asked for it and they left it as just advice, and not something that I “should” also do. They knew what worked for them and that was it.

No shaming others for not doing what they did. No statements of right or wrong. Just their own experiences, which I appreciated very much.

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I’m sure that other moms have disagreed with my way of parenting, and vice versa, after all, we can’t be expected to do everything the exact same way, but I haven’t felt judged by any of them.

Photo by Joshua Pennock from Burst

I feel more accepted, as a Mom, than I ever have in my life.

And so encouraged, too.

That’s the neat thing about becoming a mom. It changes us.

Whereas before, we may have been mean or freely critical of others, we change after holding the most perfect human being we’ve ever seen in our arms. And after taking so much care of that little bit of perfection, we know that we would never want to hurt them or for anyone else to hurt them, so it’s easy to see others that way, too.

Motherhood changes our view of the world around us and makes us better. Or at least that’s what happened to me.

I know that I now see other mothers more clearly than I did before I was a mom.

I had ideas of what is right and wrong, but now I feel like I can focus on applying that to my own little one, instead of judging someone else for not doing what I think is right. It’s also so interesting to see how different children can be raised, and that it’s all still okay.

For example, I am very shy and am not comfortable breastfeeding in public, without covering up. So, I didn’t understand why some breastfeeding women wouldn’t just put a cover on, but would expect others to just be okay with seeing their boobs, even if it’s to feed a baby. But, now that I’ve been a breastfeeding mom, I can understand it a little more.

It still isn’t for me, and I couldn’t imagine having my bare boob out in front of others, but I don’t feel quite as strongly about other moms doing it now. Sometimes you have to be in the situation to understand others in that situation. And that is just life.

People aren’t going to agree with you. But moms knows this, and so we can support each other, even through the differences in preference.

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Photo by Sarah Pflug from Burst

Different is okay.

Think back to when you were a kid and visited a friend’s house. Their food was different, their way of playing was different. Maybe they played inside watching T.V. or playing games versus going outside, maybe they had a pool or a jungle gym, or would go to a park nearby all the time. They might’ve spoken differently to their parents than you did. Maybe they had didn’t have an allowance and you did, or vice versa.

But even with those differences, there was truly no place like home. And your kids will feel the same way about you. You are HOME. But to other kids, their parents are HOME.

And it’s the same thing now as it was when we were kids, only we are the parents making these rules that aren’t the same as other parents.

Motherhood is not easy.

But we can make it easier on each other when we are supportive and don’t judge other moms for doing what they feel is right.

A lot of judgement also comes from non-parents. That’s when I was more judgmental, hence the public bare breastfeeding statements.

I have a little brother that is fourteen years younger than me and I gave my parents so much “advice” about raising him. Even though they already mostly raised two kids, I knew better than them. Haha!

But I didn’t realize how ridiculous that was until I was much older. And after becoming a parent, I’m realizing even more things that I was wrong about back then when it came to my parent’s parenting. Having the shoe on the other foot really opens your eyes.

I’ve never been a part of a club that I really liked and really felt accepted by. My experience in The Mom Club, so far, has been wonderful.

I have a friend who was worried that I wouldn’t talk to her as much after becoming a mom.

She doesn’t have children, yet, and thought I would make mom-friends and wouldn’t have an interest in my non-mom friends anymore.

I told her it was ridiculous, and it still is to me, but, I can see now why she thought that.

It’s so nice to have that kindred feeling with someone.

We’ve been through the trenches and know how hard it can be.

We’ve been so overwhelmed with happiness and love, that we can’t help but bring it everywhere we go. Maybe not all the time, as we all will have our days and need to vent or be alone. We still need to be sure to take care of ourselves and also have other moms we can lean on. Give and Take.

And I’m not saying that all mothers are happy-go-lucky – it’s hard to be anything but exhausted, at times – but we are definitely happy for each other.

I want to say a big thank you.

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Thank you to all the moms that have given me advice and encouragement when I’ve talked about the difficult times I’ve run into, especially my sister-in-law. We’ve had so many talks about our kids and she’s always so nice and non-judgmental. She’s an amazing mom and has been an incredible support for me.

I hope all of you moms have at least one other mom that can support you and be there for you,so you don’t feel alone during the tough times of motherhood.

If you don’t have someone like that, please find a mom’s group to join. It’s so extremely important.

The Mom Club’s only rule is to lovingly be there for one another. And we are.

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